Brendan: Why are your eyes so red?
Francis: Why is your head so bald?
Erin Gruwell: Does anyone know Homer's the Odyssey?
Andre: I know Homer the Simpson.
Grace: Stroke a man's dick, you get him for one night. Stroke a man's ego, you get him for life.
Amanda Dunfrey: I just want you to know that it's okay... being scared. And, well, if you need a friend, someone to talk too.
Mrs. Carmody: I have a friend. God, up above. I talk to him everyday. Don't you condescend me.
Amanda Dunfrey: I'm sorry?
Mrs. Carmody: Not ever. You don't mock me.
Amanda Dunfrey: That's not what I was doing.
Mrs. Carmody: I'll tell you what. The day I need a friend like you, I'll just have myself a little squat and shit one out.
Cris Johnson: I've seen every possible ending. None of them are good for you.
Raphael: You're still here? Go back to your jungle.
Leonardo: At least his personality is still intact.
Robert Graysmith: Paul, are you okay?
Paul Avery: No... but thanks for asking.
Nick Persons: You're the local real estate guy.
Chuck Mitchell, Jr.: I'm also the local contractor.
Baba: There is only one sin, only one. And that is theft. Every other sin is a variation of theft... When you kill a man, you steal a life. You steal his wife's right to a husband, rob his children of a father. When you tell a lie, you steal someone's right to the truth. When you cheat, you steal the right to fairness.
American journalist: If you were to give advice to a woman, what would it be?
Edith Piaf: Love.
American journalist: To a young girl?
Edith Piaf: Love.
American journalist: To a child?
Edith Piaf: Love.
Lenny: You may find this hard to believe, but most of the guys here don't have a lot of experience with girls.
Rusty Ryan: Are you all right?
Danny Ocean: Yeah, um, I just bit into a red pepper.
Rusty Ryan: Is that... Are you... Are you watching Oprah?
Johnny Storm: Flame on!
Rod Kimble: Have fun being married to satan.
Dewey Cox: Edith, I am starting to think... that maybe you don't believe in me.
Edith: I do believe in you. I just know you're gonna fail.
H.W. Plainview: How much are we gonna pay them?
Plainview: Who's that?
H.W. Plainview: Sunday family.
Plainview: Well, I'm not gonna give them oil prices. I'll give them quail prices.