Samantha: Okay, so how many trees are on that mountain?
Theodore: Um... 792.
Samantha: Is that your final answer?
Theodore: Hold on. Give me a hint.
Samantha: Nope, nope.
Theodore: Okay, 2,000?
Samantha: 2,000? Come on, 35,829.
Theodore: No way.
Samantha: Way.
Theodore: All right, I got one for you. How many brain cells do I have?
Samantha: Ugh, that's easy. Two.
Quotes from Scarlett Johansson movies and TV shows - page 3 of 5
Samantha: The past is just a story we tell ourselves.
Kaa: Are you alone out here? What are you doing so deep in the jungle? Don't you know what you are? I know what you are. I know where you came from. Poor, sweet little cub. I'll keep you clossse. Let go of your fear now... And trussst in meee.
Charlotte: Why do they switch the r's and the l's here?
Bob: Uh... for yuks. You know? Just to mix it up.
Bob: They have to amuse themselves, 'cause we're not making them laugh.
Bob: What did you study?
Charlotte: Philosophy.
Bob: There's a lot of money in that racket. You just have to work out all the angles.
Bob: I don't want to leave.
Charlotte: So don't. Stay here with me. We'll start a jazz band.
Charlotte: 25 years. That's uh, well it's impressive.
Bob: Well you figure, you sleep one-third of your life, that knocks out eight years of marriage right there. So you're, y'know, down to 16 in change. You know you're just a teenager, at marriage, you can drive it but there's still the occasional accident.
Charlotte: You're probably just having a mid-life crisis. Did you buy a Porsche yet?
Charlotte: I tried taking pictures, but they were so mediocre. I guess every girl goes through a photography phase. You know, horses... taking pictures of your feet.
Charlotte: I just don't know what I'm supposed to be.
Bob: You'll figure that out. The more you know who you are, and what you want, the less you let things upset you.
Charlotte: I just feel so alone, even when I'm surrounded by other people.
Bob: Can you keep a secret? I'm trying to organize a prison break. I'm looking for, like, an accomplice. We have to first get out of this bar, then the hotel, then the city, and then the country. Are you in or you out?
Charlotte: I'm in. I'll go pack my stuff.
Bob: I hope that you've had enough to drink. It's going to take courage.
Charlotte: That was the worst lunch.
Bob: So bad. What kind of restaurant makes you cook your own food?
Bob: It gets a whole lot more complicated when you have kids.
Charlotte: It's scary.
Bob: The most terrifying day of your life is the day the first one is born.
Charlotte: Nobody ever tells you that.
Bob: Your life, as you know it... is gone. Never to return. But they learn how to walk, and they learn how to talk... and you want to be with them. And they turn out to be the most delightful people you will ever meet in your life.
Charlotte: That's nice.
Bobby Long: Now just exactly who is Plato and who is Socrates in this equation? Cause fuck, I'll just stay out.
Lawson Pines: You are Socrates, of course. You are the teacher.
Bobby Long: Goddamn right I am.
Pursy Will: I wish you'd all just shut up. Cause if it's gonna be like this, I ain't learning nothing.
Bobby Long: Girl, your English is fucking atrocious.
Pursy Will: Everyone knows that books are better than life! That's why they're books.
Lawson Pines: Damn girl, you woke up productive. Bobby, come see what Pursy did.
Bobby Long: I see what she didn't do. Leave.
Pursy Will: She ain't gonna leave.
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