Mr. Monk Makes A Friend - S5-E11
Monk: [On the phone with Hal] Oh that, that, that was just my assistant, Natalie. Uh? Ah, hold on, I'll see. [Speaking to Natalie] Are you hot?
12th Aug 2018
Mr. Monk Makes A Friend - S5-E11
Monk: [On the phone with Hal] Oh that, that, that was just my assistant, Natalie. Uh? Ah, hold on, I'll see. [Speaking to Natalie] Are you hot?
2nd Aug 2018
Two Sane Guys Doing Normal Things - S1-E8
Bart: You think, maybe, surprises are good sometimes? Like, there could be such a thing as a surprise that helps you?
Ken: Yes. I do. Yeah. What doesn't kill you, you know, usually makes you...
Bart: Makes you hurt real bad and makes you cry.
29th Jul 2018
Omar: That's the great thing about the compound bow, a great equalizer. A little bit of practice, even a girl can make that shot.
25th Jul 2018
Detective Estevez: You didn't...see anything weird this morning, did you Mr. Brotzman?
Todd Brotzman: Yes. No. M-Maybe. I don't know.
Detective Estevez: Are you aware you just gave every possible response to that question? Eyebrows. [Detective Zimmerman raises his eyebrows].
15th Jul 2018
Bender: You honor me, Chairman Koji.
Iron Cook Chairman: Domo arigato, Mr. Roboto.
23rd Jun 2018
My Problem With Popplers (a.k.a. The Problem With Popplers) - S2-E18
Professor Farnsworth: Hey, unless this is a nude love-in, get off my property.
Hippie Protester: You can't own property, man.
Professor Farnsworth: I can, but that's because I'm not a penniless hippie.
20th Jun 2018
Johnny Frost: Frankly, I resent being questioned every time a hooker or stripper or dominatrix gets killed in this town. Why don't you ever bug me when somebody murders a plumber?
Detective Babineaux: You hang out with a lot of plumbers?
Johnny Frost: That was rhetorical. Look, hookers, strippers, yeah. But a dominatrix? I'm a married man, Detective. I already give way too much of my money to a woman who abuses me.
18th Jun 2018
Grandmaster: Revolution? How did this happen?
Topaz: Don't know. But the arena's mainframe for the Obedience Disks have been deactivated and the slaves have armed themselves.
Grandmaster: Ooh, ah, I don't like that word.
Topaz: Which? Mainframe?
Grandmaster: No. Why would I not like mainframe? No, the "S" word, the "S" word.
Topaz: Sorry, the prisoners with jobs have armed themselves.
Grandmaster: [Smiles] OK, that's better.
18th Jun 2018
18th Jun 2018
18th Jun 2018
18th Jun 2018
Grandmaster: I love when you come to visit, 142. You bring me the best stuff. Whenever we get to talking, Topaz, about Scrapper 142, what do I always say? "She is the..." and it starts with a "B."
Topaz: Trash.
Grandmaster: No, not trash. Were you waiting just to call her that? It doesn't start with a "B."
Topaz: Booze hag.
18th Jun 2018
Rich Little: The Vegas odds tonight stand at an unprecedented 1,000 to 0. A bet of $0 on Bender pays $1,000 if he wins. Still, very few takers.
10th Jun 2018
Kevin Malone: Andy left a carton of milk in the fridge. So, I've been sneaking a little bit every day for the last three months. It's been yummy. But now, Andy's coming back. So, I guess it's good-bye, chunky lemon milk.
10th Jun 2018
10th Jun 2018
Michael's Last Dundies - S7-E20
Michael Scott: The Dundies are my baby, and they need to go on. When Larry King died, they didn't just cancel his show. They got Pierce Morgan to come in and do his show, and that way Larry lives on.
10th Jun 2018
Gabe: [headshot] I started dating Erin this summer. It has been, in a word, exquisite.
Erin: [headshot] Gabe is awesome. He has accomplished so much career-wise and height-wise. Thank God he's my boss because I would not have said yes to a first date...if I didn't have to. But...it's been great.
Andy: [headshot] Am I angry that Gabe stole my girlfriend over the summer? No. I've been through anger management, OK? So right now I am sitting on a nice beach at Cape Cod, gazing out across the whitecaps. Oh, look, it's a humpback whale. How pretty. He's eating Gabe.
10th Jun 2018
Michael Scott: It's not been a blockbuster year for me financially. My Blockbuster stock is down.
10th Jun 2018
Michael Scott: A concierge is the Winnipeg equivalent of of a geisha. This is a woman who has been trained in the fine art of fanciness and pleasure. And when you meet one, it is intoxicating. Just what the doctor ordered.
10th Jun 2018
Pam Beesly: Now that I think about it, Angela and Andy might actually make a good couple. But I couldn't do that to Dwight...or Angela...or Andy.
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