Gigi: Girls are taught a lot of stuff growing up. If a guy punches you he likes you. Never try to trim your own bangs and someday you will meet a wonderful guy and get your very own happy ending. Every movie we see, Every story we're told implores us to wait for it, the third act twist, the unexpected declaration of love, the exception to the rule. But sometimes we're so focused on finding our happy ending we don't learn how to read the signs. How to tell from the ones who want us and the ones who don't, the ones who will stay and the ones who will leave. And maybe a happy ending doesn't include a guy, maybe... It's you, on your own, picking up the pieces and starting over, freeing yourself up for something better in the future. Maybe the happy ending is... Just... Moving on. Or maybe the happy ending is this, knowing after all the unreturned phone calls, broken-hearts, through the blunders and misread signals, through all the pain and embarrassment you never gave up hope.
Principal Jane Masterson: You can plunder my dungeon anytime.
Ned Gold: I'll bring my longbow.
Margaret Tate: If you touch my ass one more time I will cut your balls off in your sleep, okay?
Rachel Hansen: PMS?
Tom: What do you know about PMS?
Rachel Hansen: More than you, Tom.
Alvin: Don't worry about picking us up after school, Toby. We'll catch a ride - IN A HEARSE!
Tiana: There is no way I'm kissing a frog and eating a bug in the same day.
Sid: I say "they're vegetarians, " you say "grrr." I say "can we talk about this?" you say "grrr." I don't call that good communication.
Momma: Grrrrrrr.
Edward Cullen: I love you. You're my only reason to stay alive... If that's what I am.
Clare Abshire: I wouldn't change one second of our life together.
Connor Mead: Love is magic comfort food for the weak and uneducated!
Anna McDoogles: I was just masturbating.
Mark Bellison: That... Makes me think of your vagina.
Hermione Granger: She's only interested in you because she thinks you're the Chosen One.
Harry Potter: But I AM the Chosen One.
Blanche Gunderson: And that's okay? It's okay to pull the rug out from under folks as long as it's nobody that you know? It's okay because we're just silly podunk Minnesotans, right? We talk funny and we ice-fish and we scrapbook and we drag Jesus into regular conversation. We're not cool like you, right? So we don't matter.
Clerk: [slides card.] Declined.
Rebecca Bloomwood: Can you try again?
Clerk: [slides it again.] Really declined.
Mr. James Dowd: Everything you're ashamed of, all the parts of yourself that you keep secret, everything you want to change about yourself - it's who you are. That's your power. Deny it and you're nothing.
Rancho: These engineers are very smart sir, they didn't invent a machine which can measure the pressure on the brain. If they had, we would have come to know that this was not a suicide but a Murder.
Young journalist: Did Elise die or didn't she? I don't get it. You can't have had children and not have them.