Officer O'Clancy: No way, you're wasting your time.
Cigar Face: That's where you're wrong. YOU'RE wasting our time. And now we're gonna waste you.
Bruce: I heard that the monster is soooo big.
Chauncey: Well I bet he's got his eye on ME.
Bruce: For your information, everyone knows monsters prefer blondes.
Frank: Good afternoon ladies and gentlemen, we are the entertainment for this afternoon. Now on the shotgun we've got my man Leroy. And on the cash register, we've got that magic fingers Rico.
Rico: That's me.
Frank: And last but not least, yours truely, Frank, on the stick.
Leroy: Hey look Frank. Teeny-boppers. You like video games teeny-boppers? Your mommy give you quarters for video games? Well cough 'em up.
Frank: Now if you all do just what we tell you, you just might, just might get your asses home all intact.
The Toxic Avenger: And you can tell all your scum friends that things are gonna change in this town. I'm not just another pretty face.
Leroy: All right everybody, drop your tacos or I'll blow your brains out.
Wanda: Slug, are you sure no-one will come in?
Slug: I paid Tony 15 bucks. He said the place is ours till tomorrow morning.
Narrator: Meet little Melvin, he's a 90 lb. Weakling. Everyone hated Melvin.
