Agent K: Is that standard?
Agent J: No it came with a black dude, but he kept getting pulled over.
Numérobis: Raté, vous nous avez raté! Eh les romains, vous êtes des romaines .
Jonah: Something touched me.
Jake: Just how I like 'em... all big and big-like.
Snowbell: You've got guts, kid! And you've got spunk! Not to mention moxy! You've got guts, spunk, and moxy.
Lorne Daniels: Nobody wants you, not even the Clippers.
Ali G: Sorry I iz late, bu dere was a documentry on about monkeys.
Tracey Reynolds: Calvin, I think you should stick to basketball. You know why? You can't rap.
Harlan: Just because I'm paranoid doesn't mean people aren't following me.
Nadine: I read somewhere once that everything in life happens in threes. And that there are two kinds of people, the ones that think three's the charm and the ones that think in three strikes you're out.
Alan A. Allen: I am an inventor, Patrick. An inventor of machines.
Justine: I saw in your eyes that you hate the world. I hate it, too.
Randolph Grady: You know, I could help you study.
Starla Grady: Yeah and what's the catch?
Randolph Grady: No catch, you just gotta be nice to me for the rest of my life.
Starla Grady: Ha! I should have known you'd exploit this for emotional blackmail. That's just mean you... user.
Igby: Fuckwit.
Bagel Guy: Yeah. Fire in the hole.
Tim: Are you with me here, altar boy?
Alexander Scott: I'm going to need a couple of jars of jelly on the plane and two parachutes.
Randolph: First he takes my career, then my life, now my girl. The balls on that fuchsia fuck! I'm gonna tear him apart, piece by piece.
Game Show Host: And how about you, Bachelor #3? What's the most unusual place that you ever made love?
Bachelor #3: Inside a woman.